June 18, 2006
View Comments | Post CommentFlag-Burning
<Insert here: Enraged post about how misguided idiots think banning flag-burning is somehow alright>
I actually wrote just such a post, but decided against posting it. Instead, I exercised my right to free speech while I still can. Anyway, my argument can be summed up with this quote from Thomas Sowell:
"When your response to everything that is wrong with the world is to say, "there ought to be a law," you are saying that you hold freedom very cheap."
Instead of that long, impassioned post I wrote, here is a practical question:
What constitutes a "flag," and what sort of "desecration" will be outlawed? Consider:
Is an image of a flag a "flag" for purposes of desecration bans? If I open up a photo of a flag in Photoshop, and change it, or delete some pixels, or resize it, or alter the image so that it looks like the flag is touching the ground, have I desecrated the United States' flag? What if it's only a thumbnail of an image? Is a flag still a flag if it's only 10 pixels wide? What if it's a physical flag sewn from cloth, but it's only an inch wide? What if it's only a millimeter wide? What about if I print the flag out on a sheet of paper using my inkjet printer, and then I write on it? What if I print text excerpts from Mein Kampf on top it, and then burn it? Have I destroyed a derivative work, or have I desecrated a flag? Must a flag be made of cloth? What if I burn a large flag made out of some other material? Wood, paper, etc.? Must the flag have exactly the correct colors in order for it to be illegal to burn it? What if the flag is faded? What if the flag is extremely faded? What if the flag has been entirely bleached out? Will desecration of a 2-D flag be illegal? What about a 1-D flag? What about a theoretical 5-D flag? What if I take a picture of a flag, but the flag only occupies 90% of the frame? Is my picture a flag? What if my flag is otherwise normal, but has a spot on it? What if, while a flag is waving on a television, I turn off the television? What if I only slightly char the edge of a flag? What if a flag is already tattered, then can I burn it? If my flag happens to catch on fire, must I collect the ashes and keep them in a flag urn? Will desecration be context-specific? What if I burn a flag while talking about how wonderful the flag is? What if I hold up a flag and talk about hating America?
Well? What is a flag, and what kind of workable law can prevent its desecration?
Posted at June 18, 2006 5:35 AM | Comments (11)
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What if you autograph a flag?
Posted by: KCinDC at June 18, 2006 12:48 PM
On the plus side, maybe you could keep the cops from executing a search warrant by painting your door as a flag (of, and use them as curtains to cover your windows).
Posted by: Anthrope at June 18, 2006 5:58 PM
Haha. Great idea, Jason. Make your door a cloth flag, and seal it shut so that your house can only be entered by desecrating a flag.
Or induce people to commit a serious offense--dip a flag in gasoline and then leave it in an ash tray.
Posted by: David Barzelay at June 19, 2006 2:14 AM
What if you had a flag t-shirt and it got a hole in it from laundering? What if you had a flag bumper sticker and then got into an accident? What if you had a flag on a cake and then cut the cake?
This amendment is completely unworkable. Good post.
Posted by: Pagan Marbury at June 19, 2006 12:54 PM
What if you had a flag t-shirt and it got a hole in it from laundering? What if you had a flag bumper sticker and then got into an accident? What if you had a cake decorated with a flag and then wanted to serve the cake? Can you cut it?
Should we outlaw flag-themed clothing, car adornments and food? Or should we write ALL the exeptions into the constitution? Even then you're right, we'd still have to deal with the "what type of flag is protected" issue.
This amendment is completely unworkable. Good post.
Posted by: Pagan Marbury at June 19, 2006 12:57 PM
I'm sure you know the 'proper' way to dispose of a worn out flag is to burn it 4 U.S.C. §8(k).
So an ammendment would have to make an exepction for this...
Also, you're not allowed to "wear" the American flag... 4 U.S.C. §8(j)
Oh, and flag curtains are out too... 4 U.S.C. §8(d)
Posted by: daniel at June 19, 2006 1:11 PM
Finally, a philosophical/thinking post! Haha, my only question, did you actually write that other unposted piece? If so why?
-Z-
Posted by: Zeeshan at June 20, 2006 4:50 AM
Yes, I actually wrote that other piece, and taped a two-minute video of me burning flags, on which were printed a picture of Hillary Clinton, a picture of Osama bin Laden, some text from Mein Kampf, and one with nothing printed on it. The image above is a video capture from that.
I planned on posting them, but decided not to. The long piece was, perhaps, eloquent, but it wasn't all that original. All of the ideas it contained have been more or less assimilated--at least by most of my readership, if not the general public. So I felt like posting it would just be like saying, "Look at how pretty my prose is!" without it actually serving any function.
And the video came across as very smarmy. I thought about posting it to YouTube, and I imagine it would have garnered some attention, but I kinda looked like a self-important prick in it.
So yeah, I guess that I didn't post them because, for once, I managed to keep my ego in check.
Posted by: David Barzelay at June 20, 2006 5:05 AM
That's interesting about wearing the American flag (which is a bullshit law, by the way). I saw Scott Weiland do that very thing at a Stone Temple Pilots concert, using it as an expression of the very freedom that flag provides . Also, didn't Kid Rock wear one on national television at the Super Bowl halftime show two years ago? I guess that was overshadowed by Nipplegate.
You raise a lot of interesting questions that bring even more to my mind. Like does this amendment only protect the current flag? Would it be okay to burn Old Glory or another older version of the flag? Suppose we get another state and have to add more stars; will we then be allowed to burn the current incarnation?
Good post.
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