March 27, 2006
View Comments | Post CommentBeautiful Love Happy Cat Flower Rainbow Wonderful Jesus
A lot of people seemed to think I was being a bit harsh in my last post; a bit too critical. I agree. I shouldn't have been so mean to the middle-aged concertgoers, no matter how funny the guy was, as he bent and unbent his knees to the beat of... a different drummer. I should be nicer. To quote Andrew Banecker in a recent comment on The Slant's staff board, "...perhaps we could all live in a land of candy and love, where unicorns jump over rainbows..."
To neutralize the bilious tone my blog has taken recently, I submit the following picture, after which I can again be hateful with impunity.
Posted at March 27, 2006 12:44 AM | Comments (10)
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hahahahahahaha I love you, Davey.
Posted by: Liz at March 27, 2006 5:46 AM
as much as i think the kitty and the flower are the best things you've ever posted, i have to disagree with anyone who might claim you were unnecessarily mean to the middle aged couple in your last entry.
they were both wearing tapered jeans.
Posted by: sarahthustra at March 27, 2006 7:49 AM
seriously. tapered jeans = fashion crime of the century. i was there...i saw it...it was egregious, and deserving of scorn.
in all seriousness, i think we young folk have every right to chide the middle-aged for their faux pas, because when we're in our 40s, we will want our children to point out how ridiculous we look and remind us that we once were hip and cool. teens make fun of their parents, parents bemoan "kids these days" - it's all part of a natural cycle of mutual disdain and ridicule.
Posted by: jeanette at March 27, 2006 10:41 AM
Well, but it isn't the fashion crime of the century. It's the fashion crime of the last fifteen years or so. In ten years, I'll be the old guy at the concert, whose jeans don't even taper! There's nothing a priori ugly about tapered jeans, no matters how invested we are in their hideousness. In any case, I am glad the older people were there, and I'm happy for them still attending concerts. But yeah, doesn't mean I can't make fun of them.
Posted by: David Barzelay at March 27, 2006 11:12 AM
i beg to differ. the reason that tapered jeans are so terrible (this mainly applies to women) is because by tapering at the bottom, they over-emphasize a woman's mid region, making her hips and ass look much larger than they really are and creating the FUPA to which you refer. jeans that flare even a little bit at the bottom (or even that are straight-legged) have a slimming effect by balancing out a woman's curves and proportionalizing her. curves are great, but not when they are made to look bigger because of a misguided taper.
Posted by: jeanette at March 27, 2006 11:21 AM
I agree that tapered jeans are hideous. HIDEOUS. but i do wanna throw in a word about middle-aged people. since i've been dating one, i've met quite a few middle-aged people that are really cool. definitely cooler than some 20-somethings that i know. not to argue that the people in the photo are (i.e. the tapered jeans) but you can be 40 and still be cool.
Posted by: Ula at March 27, 2006 1:52 PM
No doubt. Although a few of those criticisms were generic to older people, the vast majority of them were simply poor stylistic choices. The middle-aged can be awesome and stylish too. My mother is 55, and none of my friends who know her would ever object to her going out partying with us.
Posted by: David Barzelay at March 27, 2006 2:04 PM
Ok kids, here's the deal on the FUPA and jeans: Tapered leg jeans don't create FUPA.
Jeanette is correct that they do make your hips look larger due to disproportion, but it is where the waistline falls that creates the offending FUPA. Check it out on your mom, your grandma, or any middle-aged southern woman. They all wear jeans up to their belly button, which crams their stomach pooch into their pants.
I actually remember the first time I noticed FUPA and pondered the origin. True story. I was 4 years old and realized my teacher appeared to be smuggling a volleyball in her pants. Putting the high waistband and resulting FUPA together, I started a lifelong vigilance against both. This led to my phobia of empire waist dresses and those damn baby doll tops. Face it, unless you're teeny tiny, you look like you're pregnant or afflicted with FUPA. I tell you all this because I want to spare you the pain of being one day dissected in a blog by David's kids. You can thank me later.
Posted by: Amanda at April 3, 2006 3:39 PM
And one more thing:
95% of FUPA is physical, but 5% is due to misguided fashion choices. You sure as hell don't want to be in the 95%, but if you're accidentally in the 5%, please recognize your mistake and convert to the low-rise cut.
Smooches!
Posted by: Amanda at April 3, 2006 3:47 PM
the unicorns thing reminded me of this: http://ts2.fluxed.net/tpd/unicorn%20bloodbath%20-%20feast%20on%20the%20flesh%20of%20the%20innocent.mp3
It's a jolly song.
Posted by: Beau at April 4, 2006 12:24 AM
